Why men have affairs?
Chat about a loaded issue that no one wants to chat about, this is it. Funny thing, married dating have been going on from ancient times. Affairs can be filled with troubles, cause sorrow, and other troubles. In addition you must wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and honesty issue, money, age difference, religious background, shame, and on and on. I anticipate there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the intention of this article I should classify an affair as a long term, maybe years long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other wives/husbands, married women for dating.
Why do people have extramarital affairs? There are as many answers as there are men seeking an affair. I am sure generally though it is only the human nature, the need for care, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and loved. Here are a several reasons I have run across.
In nature we as human beings are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasurable and exciting, and sex makes us get away the world for a small period of time. This ecstasy exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels elevated enough. Someone can turn the wish on and off, some are excellent at controlling it and others are so-so at best. But we all have it, young and elder, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the exhilaration of the pursue. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another individual, for some it is the wish to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the entire romance thing. These desires and yearnings can be so strong they overcome the taboos culture has erected against extramarital affairs. For lots of individuals the yearnings will beat their fears and make them risk the wrath of not only their relatives, but the public too. So why, what is the means?
Sex Addicts, maybe some of us are. Sex is extremely good, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of physically driven sex addicts and can find away to have sex and not injure your relatives or anybody else? You would need to reduce the hazard you are taking. If you have the attitude that a good affair is one that is beneficial to all, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the major grouping, very big really. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, apart from they are comfortable in the way they exist, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Then there are the kids to look after. Your finances are so entangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to be together besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that prevent them implementing the sex act, at least not with their spouse. An affair from time to time solves the trouble while keeping the marriage whole.
Ignoring, sorrowfully this is a regular reason I fear. One or the other, as a rule the male is sexually neglecting his wife for a multitude of reasons. As a male I truly am grateful to you guys neglecting your ladies and making them obtainable to us guys of romance, making them “lonely wives” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Then there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not only neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just omitted in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Perhaps its romance that is missing, maybe it is a lack of love, could be caring is gone, maybe it is the intimacy, maybe neglect. Could be we have just grown apart, our ordinary concerns diverged. Could be it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my ages, is opposed to of what you want. Maybe I just do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that emotion that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The number one reason people give is, they look for the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to get away, for financial gain, for revenge and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair